Yes. Absolutely. What?

I don't look good in green.

2008-07-19T11:51:00.002-04:00

After connecting with a guy I knew (envied) in high school, Andy Farkas, I realized that my life could have been incredibly different.

Being confronted with the idea that I could have made choices that would have lead to more success as an artist only makes me think that I what I have now somehow pales in comparison.

But, would I have been happy in that life? Would I have stayed mediocre, only to be more obviously and continually confronted with artists who were "better"? I have been plagued with mediocrity my whole life--I can do a lot of things "okay", but nothing really well. I'm a mediocre artist, musician, writer, cook, parent, wife...and one look at Andy's work made that all the more obvious. If I had chosen to follow another path, I wouldn't have the husband and child I have now. Part of me wants to break away, start over, and see what would have become of me, and the rest of me wants to figure out where this course will take me.

I'm very depressed.

I'm five.

2008-06-29T06:47:00.002-04:00

Or will be in a couple of days. Add the numbers together sort of thing. So, I was completely blindsided by my first ever surprise birthday party--Hello Kitty theme, of course. Now I have a ton of HK swag, and got so full of cake and lemonade that I almost did the technicolor meow.

It was so cool. I just can't tell you how loved (and tricked) I felt when I saw my friends and some family there, and learned all of the secret planning and HK e-vite stuff. Carol is the bomb.

So, thanks guys, for making an awesome day for me. You all rule!

Oh, and yesterday I heard the funniest name--this guy actually changed it to this, and then later changed it to Variable--Snaphappy Fishsuit Mokiligon. Love it.

OUCH!!

2008-06-23T16:16:00.002-04:00

So, for the past few months, I've been nauseous, and my stomach has been burning and bloating constantly. Yuck, right? So I had an upper endoscopy today, and heres what's wrong:

Gastritis
Hiatal Hernia
4 ulcers
Grade 2 Esophagial erosion.
Multiple cold biopsies for Helicobacter pylori infection.

So, that explains the problems. Now I'm on Prevacid. Yay.

No chocolate-covered fried chicken and orange juice for me today. Oh, well.

I'm effing hardcore, bitches.

2008-06-17T23:11:00.002-04:00

Okay, so I went in for a colonoscopy (yeah, ew, I know) and had some weird things removed from my innards. The cool thing, though, is that I now have a tattoo on the inside of my colon. Two dots of india ink. So, like, I have a colon on my colon. How cool is that?

(Hey, at least for one day of my life I wasn't full of s**t.)

Fun!!!

2008-04-29T21:36:00.002-04:00

Just in case you want to give Syphilis for Christmas...

Giant Microbes

Yay!

2008-04-29T17:12:00.001-04:00

My Sea Monkeys have hatched!

Yes, I'm a whiner.

2008-04-15T12:43:00.001-04:00

But you knew that. (Love you, big brother).

Oh, and I want this:
The Hello Kitty Ferrari.

Yeah.

Thanks for not reading my stuff.

2008-04-14T18:44:00.002-04:00

Because I like wasting my time typing stuff.

I'm typing other stuff right now, stuff that makes me sound smart...like stuff about dendroremediation of trinitrotoluene, botanical microactuators, and seedless vascular hyperaccumulation of inorganic arsenic derivatives.

Not that you care, or anything.

Sick of writing papers.

Sick of writing blogs.

Waste of time.

Oh, yeah....A dream come true....

2008-04-10T10:07:00.003-04:00

2009...Johnny Depp AND Christian Bale in one flick....I'm so there.

Fun...and Candy!!

2008-03-23T19:49:00.004-04:00

Okay, I'm a n00b and can't move the pictures around in order....Deal with it!

Back wall of ToyJoy

Me, the E and the back of ToyJoy....

The cutest baby in the world, my little niece, Amira.

Gunne Sax at Sonny's Vintage...I wish I was a size 4, and had $500 to spend...

The Nuns of ToyJoy...

Tommy, Me, Dave, Amira, Karen, Anna, Christine, Ethan and David 3.

Finally, the elusive Sifer's Valomilk Candy Bar.....Copped!

Me on the Cow at Phil's...I love cows...

And the inside of ToyJoy, the coolest store off Guadalupe.

More pictures to come...

Spoiled Princess.

2008-03-22T09:58:00.003-04:00

Romantic songs under a full moon, while languishing in a hot tub...
King-sized suite, patio level, overlooking a glittering pool...
Terry-lined waffle-weave bathrobes...
Bathtub with jacuzzi jets, with dial timer...
Thick, fluffy towels...
Bed with down comforter, eight pillows...
And quiet mornings to myself.

I'm spoiled.

And I deserve it.

Sucktacular.

2008-03-16T20:56:00.002-04:00

I had a pretty nasty anxiety attack this evening--the first since I got out of the CPAT. Let's just hope it doesn't continue through my vacation.

I think between the impossible Trig midterm, the trip, Ethan being uber-hyper and difficult, the loss of the very early child #2, (news of which need not be circulated) and the resulting hormone fluctuations, life is getting a bit much. I will work on my techniques taught to me in therapy, and see if they indeed work.

Smile. Jesus loves you.

Cerebral Whoopie-Cushion

2008-03-13T13:40:00.002-04:00

Oy.

Endosymbiosis, mycotechnology, secondary metabolites, algal biotechnology and trigonometry. Happy Spring "Break"....

*ppthbbbbt*

O....M....G.....

2008-03-03T13:14:00.002-05:00

Nanofabrication.

Electron, Ion and Photon Beam Technology

Yeah.

It's real.

hurk

2008-02-26T16:26:00.001-05:00

Can I take a sick day?

Please?

No?

Why not?

Oh. Thanks for clearing that up.

Out of the mouth of Ethan...

2008-02-25T21:14:00.002-05:00

Oy...

"Hooray to Daddy for being annoying!"

"Now get out of the car so I can drive."

What are we going to do with this kid?

It's nice to feel like a loser...really.

2008-02-21T14:03:00.002-05:00

This guy's work makes me want to smack myself in the head. With a spiked femur. Repeatedly.

He's 20.

Chris Kayler Photography

I need a real studio. I need real time to work. Ideas are great, but until I can USB my brain to the computer, the ideas are useless. Invent that, or give me what I need for production:

Space (without carpet)
Framing tools
Casting materials
A steel T-square
A steel ruler (cork-backed)
Endless supply of Windsor-Newton ink
Endless supply of spotter brushes
Mulberry paper of all colors
Assortment of x-acto blades with a comfortable handle
Small oven for firing polymer clay.

And time. Lots of that.

Supermom does Valentine's Day.

2008-02-13T20:30:00.003-05:00

Cookies for the Pre-K party tomorrow...

And my little helper...

Yes, the cookies are a bit over the top, but why not have fun in the kitchen!

(I foresee a lot of this in the future...)

Geek? Yes! (but not near the house plants...)

2008-02-11T16:01:00.000-05:00

After exposing two Potato Dextrose Agar plates on Friday afternoon, after a thorough cleaning of the house, I discovered that my plants were hosting some interesting friends.

This is Monday afternoon, after 4 (or more) spore production cycles of Mold/Fungus "X". Lord knows what kind of weirdness is visible from the underside (pic 2) Um...And I have to keep this plate going until Thursday evening. I think it's going to explode. I don't think I want to breathe next to my houseplants, though.

Strangely enough, the plate exposed in the carpeted (no, not our decision) bathroom is mostly clean, but I'm starting to see some colonies on it. Can't wait to see what that turns into.

New York Delft!!

2008-02-08T19:08:00.000-05:00

Neat!! I want....

Rats with good P.R.

2008-02-06T09:17:00.000-05:00

That's what Jim calls squirrels. I, however, think they are just the cutest things ever. Especially when you can look in your yard, and see at least 20 of them chasing eachother, flying from limb to limb, and chittering away like bickering spouses, thanks to the many oak and hickory trees on our lot. Cheap entertainment. I leave a few Georgia pecans out on the back porch every day, and one of the little guys from the back yard grabs one, jumps on the screen door, stares at me for a moment, then runs off with his treasure. Definitely makes my mornings a little brighter.

Yo quiero...

2008-02-02T22:22:00.000-05:00

Go to Cuba.

The music is indescribably beautiful and real . Ibrahim Ferrer...wow. (Some of you might know him from "Latin Simone" by the Gorillaz.) Just listen, if you can, to "Compositor Confundido." Awesome. Some of his stuff is a bit slow and Brazilian-y, but the real power shows in his African-influenced polyrhythms and harmonies.

Another great is Eliades Ochoa. Anything of his. His music is more rugged, simple, and sad, but songs like Que Sabroseao bring out the beats.

I want to go to Cuba!!!!!!!

Except that I can't. fzzzzzt.

Stuff....and things.

2008-02-01T10:16:00.000-05:00

Okay, first, there are 2 things destroying my diet right now. I blame them entirely.

1. Pringles minis. I don't know why they're so good, but they are.
2. Twix Java. Coffee, Caramel, Chocolate Cookie, all covered in chocolate. Need I say more?

Here's something that would turn me off from food altogether...

That's right, folks...Straight from Germany--Cheeseburger in a Can. CHEESEBURGER in a CAN.

Yeah. Except it doesn't look like that after it's cooked. False advertising at its finest.

Anyway, back to lunch.

इन्तेरेस्तिंग स्तुफ्फ़...

2008-01-24T15:47:00.000-05:00

Wow...Hindi transliteration....

Anyway, I'm researching proton-gradient prokaryotic propulsion. Awesome. Some guy uses it as a justification for intelligent design. I wonder.

About the name

2008-01-17T21:07:00.000-05:00

It doesn't have anything to do with my radioactively cute niece. It's taken from the word anacrucis or anacrusis, which means:

1. One or more unstressed syllables at the beginning of a line of verse, before the reckoning of the normal meter begins.

2. Music See upbeat.

[New Latin anacrsis, from Greek anakrousis, beginning of a tune, from anakrouein, to strike up a song : ana-, ana- + krouein, to push.]

Neat, huh?

Here's a visual, if you need it.

Killing Ninja Snowmen with a dishrag,

2008-01-17T14:49:00.000-05:00

when I should be studying.